Monday, October 8, 2012

catching up

So sorry to have not written much. I really don't have much time to myself. When I am home with G, it is often just me and him, and he has really been a handful lately.
Lots of things have happened, where to begin?
Socially: He has learned how to use the word "NO!" He's has really not used it in the right context until fairly recently. To say no in the past, he would just push his hand up, sort of like "talk to the hand" if you can picture that.
He is getting better at asking for what he wants, but still climbs things and moves furniture to get what he wants without saying a word.
Potty training: he can, about 70% of the time, tell us he has to "say good bye to poo poo" and we go to the potty and we have a routine down where we take his dirty pull up or cloth diaper and flush the mess. Parents of non-neuro typical children know just how awesome this really is.
I am so proud.
To say that I am exhausted is an understatement. I just got some labs back that show I have some auto-immune stuff going on, not sure what (hoping it is not what it looks like...) but I'm sick right now (cold?) and I feel like a truck has hit me.
Paul and I took turns going to the TACA (Talk About Curing Autism) conference this weekend. He went on Friday night and I went all day Saturday. It was so refreshing to be around parents and doctors and volunteers who knew just what I meant when I described what life with G is like.
One of my personal heroes, Martha Herbert PhD, MD, made time for me and listened to a bit about our struggles with G's gut problems. She suggested for him, and for me, since my own body is starting to destroy it's own systems, that we switch to the GAPS diet as soon as we can.
I read about it. It's actually not that bad of an idea. It will be hard for G and I to give up all the grains we love so dearly, and so this is something I will work into slowly in to his GF/CF diet. We are going to give up soy for a bit while his gut heals.
If you want to read up on the GAPS diet, I highly recommend it. It is VERY similar to paleo, but it helps you avoid foods that irritate the GI tract so that if you stay on it for about 18 mos to 2 years, you can help reverse gut damage and begin to feel better. NO PROCESSED FOODS! sounds easy, but it will be a struggle. I don't think P will want to do it.
At school, I have not been able to enforce the special diet that G is on, and some of it is because they still serve Goldfish (used to be a fave of G's) and he freaks out until he gets one (including stealing one from someone else...even when I provide substitute!) Someone needs to invent GF/CF goldfish. They will be millionaires. The school called me...someone's mom surprised them with cupcakes one morning as it was a kid's birthday that day. No warning. No time for me to bake alternative cupcakes that he could eat. They knew he would melt down if he didn't get one. Being on the spot, I said yes. I want G's gut to be calm, but I also wanted him to be socially included so I caved. Ever since, we've just been lax and I feel terrible about it. We lost so much progress. Super stimming, repetitive phrases, sensory issues back in full force...even the vacuum was too much, as well as parts of sesame street.
I learned at the conference that this crap stays in your system for about 10 months. I HAVE to be a better parent and be in more control of his dietary health.
That being said, we are moving to OHIO, but in the Cincinnati area. We found a great school program for him and I FOUND A JOB near the school AND condo. Feeling blessed. Huge pay cut for me, but I don't have to pay as much for gas and child care anymore. I MAY just get caught up on bills and debt.
I feel like a jerk moving him RIGHT after he starts his autism program here, but I have to be honest: we are renters here. We have horrible commutes that lead to very little family time. Moving closer to our ATL jobs is dumb because rent will go up and we can't afford the schools (public schools all have various programs for autism, but we didn't find too many that we felt were right for our boy that we could afford.)
So, this winter, we will be PERMANENTLY in OHIO. P's parents are graciously letting us get on our feet so we can BUY the condo from them in about 2 years. P and I want to own it out right as soon as we can (who knows...15 year mortgage maybe?) so that if we pass prematurely (which given our genes, is very likely) G will have a place to live, always.
I think the best thing we can do for him is get him in a stable, constant environment and work towards owning the place so he won't have to worry about that. I am hoping that by the time he is an adult, he will be able to hold down a job and drive and go to college if he wants to. He's so smart, we just need to give him the tools.
I am going to write more later, but I am waiting at a Starbucks to pick G up and take him to his other, regular preschool, then head to workies. The autism program called me this morning and told me he is doing great (he cried A LOT when I dropped him off...it broke my heart.) I can't wait to see him.

I'm racing against the clock at work for a deadline that is next week so I have to bust my butt today. Better stop at Walgreens or CVS for some Cold Eeze and tissues.

More soon, I promise.

By the way...that fundraiser? THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!

We can now afford several appointments that we have (the super duper autism center one is this week!!!) and all the stupid fees and appointments and paper filing, etc)

I could not do this without you.

thank you.

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